Monday, September 21, 2009

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Failure of Admissions

All because I decided to pick Singpost over DHL.

What the fuck.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Eagles

There're a few eagles left in Singapore. (Well, my mom called them 老鹰, and I do believe that there's a bit of room for ambiguity on whether they're eagles or hawks. So >_>) Gwin thought that it might be that they're lacking in food to eat - apparently it wasn't that but a lack of a habitat to live in. I guess Singapore just doesn't have enough high places to live in.

Slowly, the eagles fly away or die out, and none take its place.

What would the eagles have thought when they saw Singapore change, the buildings soaring high, their eyries mere dots from the top of the HDB? What did they think when they realized that no HDB roof would make a good nest, no matter how tall? Did they soar on wings - the eagles they are - to another land that will treat them better? Did they stay and see how long they could last, and eventually died off? Or perhaps they are in hiding! The child in me would like to give such an answer, but alas, it is unlikely.

Could the far-sighted eagle have seen in advance the troubles awaiting? Does it see its problematic future as clearly as it sees the world beneath it? Or does it stay in faith that its environment will persist until tomorrow?

We shall never know - the eagle mocks us mere humans and our incapability to see the world from a place as high as the sky.

------------------------------------------

I wonder if educational institutions who tell their students to soar on wings like eagles ever told the teachers the same thing.

Perhaps some of them figured it out themselves.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Chapter: Not Exactly The Last

It seems that Singpost is so bloody fail that this isn't going to be Chapter: The Last (as the two of them put it) for me just yet. Goddamnit.

Advice to people applying overseas never use Singpost unless you're one month before the deadline

It severely pisses me off that everytime I do something it always ends up screwing over in some terrible way or it ends up being some insanely difficult thing to do.

First they don't tell me that documents go to London by the next working day
Then they take the thing like 5 seconds before the end (It's freaking scary when people say that they'll collect it before 6.00pm and come at 5.59.55pm. It's not wrong per se but goddamnit)
Then I find out they haven't even sent it by this time

I wonder what's next >_>

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In any case, the temporary reprieve from exams (That some people don't care about, and I suppose I don't care about the fact that I care about it. Yes, they're different) comes at a good time but it's rather annoying that the bugger Singpost is ruining it so easily

TIP OF THE DAY GUYS

USE DHL INSTEAD OF SINGPOST IT IS WIN AND ACTUALLY RELIABLE INSTEAD OF THIS SHIT

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Why do I want to take Psychology?

Why do I want to take the PPS Course at Cambridge?

It is perhaps a natural result of the person that I have turned into - an observer more so than a participater.

But if you asked me, I do not have the clear interest that certain peers around me do. I do not have the flair that Jarrel has for the sciences, the dedication and passion that Jonny bears for geology, and the natural capabilities for the humanities that one like Shiru would have.

As it is, I could perhaps be at an impasse. Yet I am somehow geared towards this path. Why?

There are reasons I cannot write about. Reasons I cannot write about not because I must keep a secret, but because they are not there - I have yet to find them. Therefore we do away with them. What then, then, of the reasons that I CAN write about? Few that are particularly palatable, I would say.

The first perhaps is just general curiosity. I'm sure my peers would say that I am generally well-versed on the subjects I take (though I dare not say that I am proficient at any), and my interest in psychology and sociology may just be a curiosity pick for me.

The second perhaps is boredom. I cannot say that I bear a very strong interest in any of the subjects I currently undertake. Sufficient interest is there (perhaps more than some other students have towards any subject) but certainly none strong enough to hold a future. What then serves as a guarantee that I will undertake any university degree with the courage, determination and (dare I say it) enamored approach I had towards my current subjects? None.

Well, then, these don't make for very palatable reasons, nor very justified ones for taking sociology or psychology as a degree in a university, do they? Perhaps, despite what everyone says, a university life is not cut out for one like me! An entirely possible scenario.

The issue gets worsened when you realize the fact that sociology, psychology and cultural anthropology, for all their similarities, aren't that similar. They aren't terms which can be interchanged so freely, yet I should believe I have been doing so in a rather careless and perhaps desecratory manner. It is... an unhealthy behaviour, to say the least. I should be more clear with what I say and say that I am more interested in sociology than in psychology, though not to the extent where I would say I am extremely interested in cultural anthropology. I must unfortunately admit that that statement makes me feel like I am once again taking some form of middle-ground stance to this. Perhaps I am.

(...derp I really shouldn't write on a Gin and Tonic. Midori Tonics work fine but I guess Gin's twice as strong and twice as annoying when it comes to hindering you.)

It is ever so much easier to shoot yourself down than to pick yourself up. I guess that's why personal statements are so hard to write, aren't they?

...and unfortunately the writing of this blogpost has yet to bring me closer to writing a good personal statement. Le sigh. The occasional feverish feeling on my forehead and cheeks gets to me after a while. I guess I do have to sleep for now.

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

NO RAGNAROK ONLINE

I WILL NOT PLAY RAGNAROK ONLINE UNTIL THE END OF IB

NO YOU XI MIN

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

グードモーニング・エー・シー

明日、何かに誰かにいい事をしましょう。 例えば、挨拶すればどうですか?

”おはようございます~”って。 簡単でしょう?

家族に”おはようございます~”を言おう。
友達に”おはようございます~”を言おう。
先生に”おはようございます~”を言おう。
皆に”おはようございます~”を言おう。
だって、明日はいい日だよ。
良い天気、良い友達、良い先生、良い場所、良い学校、良い世界、

良い一日。

おはようございます、お母さん。
おはようございます、お父さん。
おはようございます、友達さん。
おはようございます、先生。
おはようございます、私。

おはようございます、私の学校。

グードモーニング・エー・シー。

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

彼と彼女

"好きではないけど嫌いではない。 ただの'いる'と言う感じだ。”

ならば彼女との感じがないんじゃない。

"そうかもしれない"

かもって言うな野郎。

"考えれば皆に聞こう。”

なにを。

”俺と彼女の関係、今は大丈夫ですか。将来は大丈夫ですか。”

何でそんなことを皆に聞こうかな。…ああ。 そうだね。 君は感じがないからさ。 そういう考えしかできないのさ。 好きや嫌いやあんたにとって存在していない子束でしょう。 あんたの世界と考えは算数だけ。 物理学だけ。 科学だけ。 そういう思いだけ。 他の思いなんてない。 好きなんてない。 嫌いなんてない。 

思いなんてない。
重いなんてない。

"一番いい結果を探すんだ。”

もうないさ。

”あるんだ。”

そうか。結婚ですか。さあ、聞こう。あんた、彼女と結婚するつもりですか。

”そうかもね。”

もうかもって言うなって言ったんでしょう?!野郎。阿呆かてめは。

ーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー

the fuck do i get worked up over shit like this for.

いやそうだね。 もう覚えました。

てめのせいじゃない。

てめのせいで俺の友達はそんなふうになったのよ。
てめのせいで俺と友達の関係はそういうもんなよ。

’好き’って言ったらいいのに。できないんでしょう。心から。好きではないか?気持ちがないか?心がないか?

ならなんで。

ファック。